Macbeth's got Shakesappeal

Today I watched a theatrical interpretation of Shakespeare's McGyver. No, Shakespeare's Matlock.  No, Shakespeare's Macbeth.  Ah yes, Macbeth.  The english speaking world spent hundreds of years trying to invent an easier language than that of Willy Shakes, and then along came the Bell Shakespeare Theatre Company and Translation Service and ruined everything, what with their spooky 16th century whisperer skills. 

If it wasn't for Mr Bell, I most definitely would have endured three long hours of what the fuck.  I caught Bell Shakespeare's excellent version of Julius Caesar last year, and I can safely say that any future dealings I have with Willy Shakes will be through their interpretative channels.  In fact it's a constant struggle for me to refrain myself from travelling back in time and whacking Mr Shakespeare with his era's version of a tazer gun.

I don't completely despise his sonnets, its just that the speech is so polite and deferential and neverending as to make no sense whatsoever.  Bell Shakespeare maintain the exquisite use of language, but cut much of the excessive wordiness for which Willy Shakes is famous, and which usually, unfortunately, put me into a voluntary induced coma.

It's interesting that the arts world have a desperate desire to maintain the historical significance of ye ole Shakespeare playeths, yet the only way they can do this is by creating theatre companies as a means of translating the playwright's brilliant yet mostly incomprehensibly complex verbal diarrhoea for the world; most of who couldn't care less either way.

The ancient Egyptians also heavily cached what they had for breakfast and tedious descriptions of how they weaved cloth and what style of sandal they wore to beat up their slaves, Bell Shakespeare, so why you not translate their hieroglyphs?  I suppose the answer is fairly simple: where for art thou marketing opportunities for an Egyptian kid patting a gazelle?

That's right - there aren't any.  If the ancient Egyptians wanted to be lauded they should have spent far more time having rampant sex with the king's consort and engaging in unbridled class war murders and dirty little regicides.  Oh wait, they did.  I think they built some stuff too.

I must admit, the only Shakesappeal for me with the old bard is that he wrote of murder and manipulation and psychological torture, minion versus minion, and death and lying and cheating all over the place, and most characters possess a minimum of around eight personality disorders, so it's right up my alley in terms of entertainment.

The Tragedy of Macbeth reminds me a lot of Australian politics.  A Red Queen receives a prophecy from three witch-like Independents that one day she will win the next election?  A storyline ripe with tyranny, bloodbaths, arrogance, madness, guilt, violence et cetera et cetera?  The backbenches are alive with the sound of people screaming?  Who says Julia doesn't have any Shakesappeal.

With Ms Gillard's current push to fan the flames of a non-existent class war in this country, of which she is desperately trying to construct, I am surprised that she isn't trying get the kindy kids reading Shakespeare sonnets rather than wasting their time learning how to finger paint.