Oh great, it's February again. Who the hell can pronounce February? I would like to stage an intervention to rid the western world of having to use the 'r' in February, or at the very least be able to ruthlessly mock extra ruddy consonants by enclosing them in a mocking-type set of brackets. I don't see the point of silent letters. Empty letters. I blame the French for this nonsense.
That crazed word fanatic, Shakespeare, has a pointless 'e' desperately clinging to the end of his name like some pathetic groupie. And thanks to Willy Shakes and other overwordiness muppets, we have an abundance of words, which means simple folk are able to breathlessly talk and talk all day long, repeating words over and over again.
Fortunately some years ago - maybe like a decade ago or something - someone decided that February sucked and it deserved to have just 28 days, with an extended 29 days every fourth year. Smart. I think we should also leap over Wednesdays, because no-one likes a week day with a silent 'd'.
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