Cake Neglect

There has been something very troubling going on at work that I believe needs to be brought to the attention of the authorities; perhaps the dudes who man the inbox for the Geneva Convention would be interested.

I first came across this atrocity last week, when I ventured into a dangerous warzone, often known as the Workplace Refridgerator.  I was unarmed at the time, so I couldn't do much to help the victim of what I thought was clearly the victim of a terrible crime.

There are certain basic minimum standards that should apply to all situations involving cake.  For example, no cake should be left behind, and yet this is what I found.  LEFT BEHIND CAKE.  I think it had been left there for a week.  It was a horrible and traumatic thing for me to witness.

There is a specific Geneva Convention protocol that relates to the protection of victims of internal conflicts.  I'm sure when they wrote it they were thinking of Cake Neglect following peace time morning teas. This is not rocket science, people.  No cake gets left behind.  

How does a whole section of people just forget about cake anyway?  Cake is never far from my mind.  I always know who has cake, how much cake they have, and I often pursue strategies to get some of it. Cake information is power in the public service.

Someone should do a thesis for their PhD on cake; oh wait, someone already has. Humanities academics doing what they do best; pompously pontificating about pointless drivel that is of little consequence to the rest of society. Sure, I harp on about pointless drivel on my blog all the time, but I don't have my hand in the taxpayer's wallet.

Sometimes I feel like I should apologise to the poor bastards who stumble across my blog and think it's something worth reading.  This is one of those times.  So, sorry, but the time you've spent here, reading about cake, will never be returned to you.  It's gone forever.